Ex-Girlfriend's Creepy Obsession and Police Telling Victim to 'Just Go Out': A Stalking Survivor's Ordeal

A man who suffered months of stalking by his ex-girlfriend has claimed that he faced secondary victimization from the police investigating the case.

[Stalking Victim / Claiming Police Secondary Victimization: "While handling this case alone for several months, I encountered a lot of absurd things. The investigator was saying things that didn't make sense... The police talked about how the perpetrator herself was having a really hard time... Even after receiving a warning notice, (the perpetrator) kept contacting me. I told them I was anxious that (she) might show up and that I was really scared, but the police said she probably wouldn't show up and would just keep contacting me, so I should just go out (outside)."]

A man referred to as A, who broke up with his ex-girlfriend in December of last year, voiced that a nightmare began from that very moment.

The ex-girlfriend, B, relentlessly contacted A by switching between 21 accounts across various platforms, including text messages, KakaoTalk, and Discord.

[Attorney Song Ji-won: "The contents of the messages implied suicide because of you, such as 'I took pills and had my stomach pumped,' and 'Something bad is going to happen to me.' Even though he continually blocked her, she even used the Toss app to send money in 1-won increments while continuing to say things like, 'Listen to my story, contact me.'"]

A eventually filed a criminal complaint against B on stalking charges, and an emergency measure known as "Interim Measure No. 3"—which bans approaching and contacting the victim—was issued against the suspect B.

However, B did not stop contacting him; she watched A's live streams in real-time as an internet broadcast BJ and invited him to open chat rooms.

A, driven to desperation, sought help from the police, but the response he received was reportedly devastating.

[Investigator in Charge: "I've heard a lot from her (the perpetrator). You know she has mental health issues right now, don't you?"]

[Stalking Victim / Claiming Police Secondary Victimization: "The problem is, I actually have thoughts of making an extreme choice myself. Seriously."]

[Investigator in Charge: "She seems to be having a really hard time with the fact that she has become a suspect. Anyway, you two were former lovers. She also receives a lot of hospital treatment for depression. But she says hospitalization is difficult right now. She doesn't have hospital bills. So I'm thinking of looking into a center I can connect her with. Anyway, since both of you are having a hard time, I hope you just don't talk to each other and live like that."]

A pointed out that the police response was inadequate simply because he is a male victim.

[Stalking Victim / Claiming Police Secondary Victimization: "(Because I) am a male victim, (the police) didn't respond very strongly and kept handling it that way. They say that in stalking cases, they must look out for the victim unconditionally and that two police cars should be dispatched, but when they actually arrive, they didn't protect me even though I asked them to, and they didn't really do anything. Then (the perpetrator) contacts me again, and this just keeps repeating..."]

[Baek Gi-jong, Former Violent Crimes Team Leader at Suseo Police Station: "They are currently taking a very wrong, inappropriate approach. They seem to view this stalking crime through the gender framework between men and women. Trying to make people understand the perpetrator by mentioning that the perpetrator is suffering from depression is a very inappropriate response for someone conducting an investigation."]

The team leader who oversaw the investigation at the time acknowledged the clumsy response.

[Anchor Kim Jong-won: "The investigator in question is a rookie police officer assigned to the team last March, and he stated that he was inexperienced in the process of investigating stalking cases. He said he said things to the victim that didn't need to be said, and that he has already severely reprimanded him internally regarding this matter. He also conveyed his position that the investigator has already been replaced and that they will prevent anyone from feeling that the investigation is biased through more neutral investigations moving forward."]

A is complaining that he is in an even more agonizing situation due to the secondary victimization by the police.

[Attorney Song Ji-won: "He says he cannot sleep. He sleeps only 2 to 3 hours now because he sleeps so much. He reportedly suffers from gastrointestinal disorders, vomiting, and dehydration symptoms. Panic disorder has also set in, making it difficult for him to go outside. He says that internet broadcasting, which is his livelihood, is also difficult right now."]

The ex-girlfriend B has currently been forwarded to the police on stalking charges, and an investigation is also underway regarding violations of the interim measures.

(Planned by: Lee Se-young | Video Edited by: Lee Yu-jin | Video Source: News Hunters | Produced by: SBS Digital News)
※ Please note: This article was translated by AI and may contain errors.